NDNation Alabama Postmortem

You know the drill by now, right? All text is pulled directly from Rock’s House via ND Nation dot com, edited only to provide the illusion of a semi-coherent narrative, because it’s funny. Original post is here. As always, thanks for not yelling at us for opinions we do not hold.

Alabama scored 31 because they didn’t feel like scoring more. Maybe Saban’s gotten bored with just dominating opponents. It’s like auto-erotic asphyxiation for the sex addict.

Brian Kelly: the bottom who thinks he’s a top. Every day that Kelly stays employed by ND is a waste of precious time. Would Meyer coach at ND for $13 million? Think how many alums refuse to donate to ND because of JS and BK. I am firing Brian Kelly today and announcing this new coach tomorrow afternoon. Like I would have after the 2014, 2016, 2017, and 2019 seasons.

We’re likely not even the best team in the state of Indiana. Our Bovine University coaches suck at coaching and their interest in recruiting matches the intensity of of a sloth. Lea should have been let go the moment he held his press conference for Vandy after the Clemson game. Kelly should slide Rees back to QB coach & bring in Herman to be the offensive coordinator.

If you read the comments beneath Pete Sampson columns, the fanbois are turning already. We need a person who knows how to hire a football coach. I’d prefer a proven recruiter with big program experience. This should not be something a bunch of message board posters are better at than the AD. But here we are.

I think I’d fill my pants with poop if “I didn’t do a good enough job preparing this team” ever came out of Kelly’s mouth. Emperor McTurdliness needs his ass kicked back to Boston, the prick that he is. Our coach really is a cock gobbler.

We do not have a win against a number one team. Clemson will finish at best 3 and they barely beat Boston College. I don’t expect to see ND back to the playoffs ever again. they’ve bungled any shot of getting back. At least in my lifetime. None of it matters while dickless wonder roams the sideline.

You can make an argument 2020 was Book’s worst year passing at ND. Clausen/Quinn: BK would have ruined them both. Kelly has brought Notre Dame to the point where Wisconsin QB castoffs are needed. We are Iowa. Let someone else develop our quarterbacks. It’s hard work! Buchner will probably go into 2022 raw, rusty, and inexperienced. I could see another 4-8 season.

Happy Notre Disney horse shit. ND was a chicken that Jack knowingly pflucked. I wasn’t aware of the rule that says we can’t touch any four and five star recruits because they are idiots. The rankings we most covet are academic rankings. The ND I first went to was not that school, but it became that school.

Seems like lots of players are bailing. Any question that this is no longer amateur athletics? ND used to abide by a strict no transfer rule. There was a principle behind that. Just as there is a principle behind requiring football players to live in dorms for 4 years and to eat meals and study with the general student body and all sorts of other quaint notions.

BK is what he is, and 2021 is likely gonna suck balls. He’s a clueless arrogant prick who has no vision for how to use his personnel and situations. A “C” coach and nothing more. Kelly goes to a coaches convention: what do you think his peer’s think: “I wonder if Brian is still sleeping with Jack…?”

As suspected the ACC is dog excrement. We were at least solid excrement instead of the watery diarrhea that most of the rest of the ACC is but in the end, shit is still shit. I had a loaded hotdog last night. The 2a.m. diarrhea was probably my top 3 least stinkiest.

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